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19 Signs That You Have Been Single For Too Long

When spring comes, you see couples walking around, hand in hand. And that can be quite confrontational if you've been single for a while. A while too long, actually. Have you been single for too long? Find out now.

1. You became somewhat asexual

Which means you do not need sex. Do you even have a reproductive organs?

2. You've stopped shaving in 1995

Because why would you have to shave if nobody is going to see it anyway? You figured it's easier to save yourself the trouble.

3. When someone looks at you, you automatically assume that there is something on your face

Just because you are not used to people looking at you in a different way.

4. The only sweaters you own are of your father

Since he is the only male role model in your life.

5. You do prefer taking a nap over going on a date


6. When you look down, you only see your belly 

All that Ben & Jerry's you've had recently.. it's a part of your diet now. Or yeah, whatever you call your eating habits.

7. There is a lot of Netflix in your life, but no 'chill'

Netflix & chill? What does that mean?

8. You use the same wine glass again and again

There still is no male companion around, therefore, all you need is just one wine glass in house

9. The only men you date are those from your favorite TV shows

Someone said Dan Humphrey? Yes, that's him. My knight in shining armor!

10. You're seriously looking for information about sperm banks, freezing your eggs and adopting children

Not that there's anything wrong with that, of course. It's just way too early to think about this. You are still young, though. There is more to life than Ben & Jerry's, Netflix and absolutely no chill.

11. Your family doesn't ask question about your love life 

It's clear they have given up hope. If you ever do get into a relationship, you'll have to let them know yourself. Ever...

12. You now wear clothes that belong to your best friend instead of your ex boyfriend.

You want to feel that you are hugged by someone and since there is no man around, you do with the love of your best friend.

13. You sometimes buy clothes in the men's department 

As it is the only way you ever get close to menswear.

14. Your most recent partner is your pillow

There's nobody around to kiss, no one that hugs you back. You know what I mean, right?

15. Every time you engage in random sex, you are afraid that you might be pregnant

Not because your body indicates it, on the contrary. It's more that you feel like you're not ready or experienced enough to become a wife and have children as you haven't been in a relationship for a long time and you don't know how it works anymore.

16. You have already bought an apartment, because you know you will be single forever

Couples often get out of an apartment so they can expand their family, so after living in an apartment for a while, they move out and get a bigger house. You know you will be forever alone, so you don't intend to leave your apartment-phase.

17. You never make your bed

Why would you, anyway, if nobody but you is going to see it?

18. You no longer respond to recommendations on dating apps

You know that these apps are a waste of your time. And the other sex? Oh, that's a waste of time as well!

19. You are unable to be happy for friends who are in a relationship

You became a bitter, old whiner who can't even be happy for someone else. We are sorry that you've reached this point now, but you know what? Right now you've given up completely and soon you will meet someone! Mark my words!

Have you been single for too long?